is it love or fear....

I had been with Lady Zen these few days and and now I am asking myself why do I heed to her words?...is it really because of love or is it because I fear she would leave me.... I felt pathetic when I realize that I couldn't leave her...I felt worthless when I heeded on everything she asked me to do....She has regained power of my will.....and I who was once the master of the masks is scare to loose her....if she become the master of my heart then I should not be with her...love is not about fear...love is about trust and about understanding of both parties....She did not tried to understand me but she is controlling me.... this is something that i must avoid.....avoid of being control