Thursday, December 03, 2009


I was once innocent. I was once like a white cloth. Then one day a demon soak the cloth in mud. I was dirty. and now I am like the night. A night without the moon and stars.

I was 8 years old. I was at the famous gathering place for demon's slayers. My father was the leader of the strongest demon's hunter pack, The Paradisa Slayer. I was so proud of him, every one was talking about him and I was proud to tell any one I saw that I was his son.

I was playing with some kids in the gathering place. Everyone knew everyone there. A man in black robe came to me. A man....that was what I thought....A normal man wearing a black robe....A man......I was innocent and I believed that everyone in the gathering place was friend. I followed him...followed him to his tent. The day the white cloth was soaked in the mud.

is it love or fear....

I had been with Lady Zen these few days and and now I am asking myself why do I heed to her words? it really because of love or is it because I fear she would leave me.... I felt pathetic when I realize that I couldn't leave her...I felt worthless when I heeded on everything she asked me to do....She has regained power of my will.....and I who was once the master of the masks is scare to loose her....if she become the master of my heart then I should not be with is not about is about trust and about understanding of both parties....She did not tried to understand me but she is controlling me.... this is something that i must avoid.....avoid of being control