For a long time in my life I haven't feel true happiness. I have been living in the dark behind this mask of a man with smiles and laughter. If I show my true self, will people accept me? Will my family accept me?... I don't have the luxury to tell the truth when the risk of telling the truth will destroy everything I have now. I don't have much now but losing what I have now means I will have nothing. I am timid to start from zero. I don't think I can survive this world from zero. I barely make it now but still I can stand in the crowd. Taking off this mask means taking on the world. Me vs the world. I will loose.
Saturday, August 17, 2019
Tuesday, January 22, 2019
Life is a torture
Life is a torture when you have to live in the shadow. I can't show the real me as it will frighten most people I know off. I have to live as they are to live with them. My true face will shock most of them to death and the ones not dead will try to kill me. I don't think fencing through the lives of the people I know off would be a good way to live but living this way now is a burden too.
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